Saturday, April 17, 2010

Hero of the Week!

Readers, we can't resist one more follow-up to the week's most important story: the shocking attack on Free State Brewery.

But so much attention was focused on the railroad spike-wielding transient named Horse Shit that the hero of the tale got lost in the shuffle. Today we are here to celebrate Craig Hoffman, the "49-year-old self-employed contractor" who pinned the villain to the street until the cops arrived. Here's his humble take on the day's horrifying events: "“Free State is a local community on its own. I have a lot of close friends here, and I was just helping protect what is close to me."

Chip: "I'm pretty sure that 'self-employed contractor' is local hippie slang for unemployed. My guess is that just about everyone drinking beer with Hoffman down there in the middle of a Wednesday afternoon is a 'self-employed contractor.'"

Richard: "Hoffman is going to get so many free beers out of this. I'm envious."












That's all for today, LC-fans, as Richard has business downtown with Earth Day festivities and Record Store Day. But what should he witness first? Perhaps a performance of “Jedi Knights and Galactic Princesses: The Fight 2 NOTB Polluted" at the Arts Center? Or perhaps a horde of hipters at Love Garden wrestling over a sweet vinyl copy of Neutral Milk Hotel?

And speaking of Love Garden, The Wayward Blog recently offered a nice playlist from owner Kelly Corcoran. Check it out, if you want to see what a true Larryville tastemaker is playing in the store these days, such as "Somebody Keeps Callin'" by the Baby Grandmothers: "This is the last track on my favorite compilation of 2009, Forge Your Own Chains. It's a collection of Psychedelic tunes from 1968-1974. It's really well selected, the liner notes are really informative and fun to read, and really well sequenced. We actually had to take a hiatus from listening to this at Love Garden because of the Brain-Melting side effects."

Here's the site:

http://blogs.pitch.com/wayward/2010/04/love_gardens_kelly_corcoran_makes_an_epic_playlist.php#more

6 comments:

beth said...

He'd better get free beer!

Railroad Spike Stout said...

I'm hoping that the event itself inspires a few new beers!

(but I don't want a beer called "Horse Shit"...which would certainly taste like PBR).

Capt. Chanute said...

I think said beer should be dedicated to all of (us) self-employed contractors that choose to throw 3 and change at a beer instead of buying a 12pk of PBR for 7$ at Jensen's. Oh wait...

The Evil Mark Hamill said...

I'll buy that fucking genius a hero for every single piece of hippie shit in lawrence whom ass he beats!

In face, I want to don a wet suit and have his ass join me in a vigilante war of fucking bippitybang that will make Roger Ebert shit through his mouth and have it come back out the other end again in abject horror at our pluralistic fucking democrafuckity!

--Bluntmen unite, muthafuckers! Train spike, me? Train spike you bippity bamm!

translations... said...

...somehow the thought of Beth makes me channel my inner Jay. :)

cl.thier said...

I'm going to be getting my "self-employed contractor" on come Friday afternoon! Feel free to join me...